I have natural curly hair. When I was a kid, my mom used to make my hair curly all the time. But growing up, I was insecure about my hair like every kid. My mom stopped and started putting my hair in ponytails or a slick back half up half down hair due, but it would just be poofy and not styled. When COVID-19 happened, I had the opportunity to start doing my natural curls, but I hated it. My parents never helped me style it, even though my mom also has natural curls.
In 8th grade, my hair was never down unless straightened, but that was once or twice a month. My hair was either in a braid or up in a clip. Same for my first semester freshman year, it was always in a clip. By my second semester, I wanted my hair curly. I always did a half-up half, half-down look because I hated how it looked when it had volume. I started putting products in to make it look pretty, and people always told me my hair smelled good when they hugged me or were near me. It wasn’t the best, but I was taking baby steps.
In my first semester of sophomore year, I still did a half up, half down, but I started to straighten it. Some days, it’ll be curled, others curled with the straightener. By the end of the semester, I had always started to straighten it. Second semester, I straightened it all the time but left it down instead of a half up half down look.
The summer going into my junior year, I made a big chop. My hair was short and curly. Here and there, I straightened it but tried to leave it alone as much as possible. We went to Mexico for a week with my grandparents, and for that whole week, I did my curly hair routine every few days and wore my natural curls; it was the best. I felt confident there because I didn’t know anyone when we would go out, and people didn’t care. If I were to wear it here, I’d be scared and look for anyone I know so they don’t see me.
When Junior started, I started straightening my hair again, this time two to three times a week. It was bad, like really bad. Now, once I get out of the shower and it dries, half of my hair doesn’t curl anymore; it’s just straight. Anything above my collar bone curls, but not as good as it did during the summer. So, I need to do another big chop to grow it healthier.
A lot of people with curly hair feel insecure and do the same thing I do. My mom and my aunties do this, too, but it’s not as bad as mine right now. I hope I do commit because I miss my curly hair.